Week 11 - When words mean more

Ok, so poetic and distortion isnt what you enjoy...so I will try something a little different, and if it doesnt work. then I will try something different....again

I stare at you on my dresser. As I open you i see all the wonderful memories. Hanging with all my wonderful friends. All the summers of camping with my family. Living the life of a teenager is quit an experience. You mean more to me then a simple object, your a part of my life. You grow as i grow, each moment filling up with more and more memories from the past. Ah, graduation! That was the best feeling I ever had. College was the next step in our adventure of life. Life has truly been an experience for me and you help remember them easier for me. My first speeding ticket was rough for me, but I gave you my ticket to help me remember how pissed I was when I got pulled over after just having my license for a month.  Sometimes I ignore you, or dont look at you everyday, but I know you are always around and will be there no matter what. You grow as a grow, and will always be a part of me. My nike shoe box with all my lifes memories!

Week 12 Taking a Risk

You walk into the store and stride down the aisle; you pick me up and try to look casual while you carry me down to the checkout line, You pull out your wallet, you soon will be mine, your friends are observing every move that you make, the clerk asks for your ID You show him a fake, you quickly walk down to the front of the store, your friends are waiting for you, as you step out the door.

You hop in the car and drive away from the shop, then you shut off the ignition and pop off my top, you take a few drinks, and pass me around, thats when you decide to take a drive around town, You turn on your car, and put your foot on the clutch, Im sober, I didnt have very much you say, you pull onto the road, with me by your side, taking occasional sips, as you enjoy the ride,

Then the brakes on the car in front of you squeal, you try hard to stop, but lose control of the wheel, you skid off the road, and you know you have crashed, the dashboard, is shattered, the windshield is smashed, Minutes like hours, your in treacherous pain, that washes your senses, envelops your brain, the screams all around you are faint to your ears, as life flashes before you, your hopes and fears,

Minutes like hours, you plead and pray, Ill never touch it again, just let me live one more day, your mind starts to go dark, it falls apart piece by piece, then you slip into blackness, the pain has finally ceased, Before you entered that store, you should have thought twice, for I am the substance that cost you your life,

Week 10 distancing and alienation

I am quite sure you are going to kill me one day. I can still picture your shy smile in my head after all this time. I should be angry with you. But I can't be. I lay back and stare up at the stars. The graveyard is the only place dark enough to see them. I remember going to the planetarium in elementary school and the feeling i got when the lights went out and the stars dotted the ceiling. I feel small, a speck in the giant eye of the universe. It's a comforting feeling for me.

*****
I first saw you kneeling by a grave, trailing your slendar fingertips across the lettering. Your eyes filled with some unclassifiable emotion. For some reason, I walked towards you laying a hand on your shoulder. I felt compelled by some outside force to erase that look off your face. your eyes met mine. "She was so young." My arms wrap around you and you sob into my shoulder. We'd spend many nights together, crying on each other's shoulders.

*****
The mist rolls into the graveyard, hanging just above the graves. I wish my eyes were cameras so I could take pictures of everything I see when I come here. Everything that reminds me of you. I want to ask if you are here with me but the words get stuck in my throat. I already know you're not here. i am freezing, my blood turning to ice. But you don't make me cold. Sometimes i wish I could seep into the ground and become part of you. I feel like I'm dying. A tiny piece of me every day. I try to maintain control over myself but here? It doesn't matter here.

*****
Before I know it, i am crying. I feel so fucking stupid. I don't want to be a wreck. I want to be together for you. I know I promised I would. I failed you. I am so sorry for that. I wish I could tell you how sorry I am for the way I've behaved. My fingertips caress the headstone in the same way you did all those years ago. "I never told you enough how much I loved you." I curl up by your headstone and close my eyes. Tonight, the only place I can sleep is here. With you.

Week 9 Linked Vignettes

To see her is to breathe. Her smile fills my lungs with oxygen. Her eyes create the air, a soft, gentle breeze that pulls me towards dusk, and past another lonely day.

***********

All the signs and people say that she's to good for me. When she walks up to me, my brain yells so loud, I can't even hear her speak. "come on you fool, get real, she could never like an idiot like you, you babble and you sweat, your not smart enough, or good looking enough, just give it up you fucking loser"

***************

I remember in the third grade, when I put my tongue on the metal of the swing set, in the middle of winter and it stuck. She was the only one who didn't laugh or make fun of me, she ran and got a glass of warm water, and rescued me from my stupidity."I hope it doesn't hurt too bad, JD",
as she kissed my lips and ran away.

*****************

She moved away that spring, without a mention or goodbye. Now she walks the halls of another school with a guy on each arm and her nose in the air, pretending she doesn't care about the simple things in life. But her smile still fills my lungs and her eyes still hold a flicker of who she once was, and who she will be again because the petals said that she loves me.