Story of my life!
I haven't always been that strong in writing. Usually my average grade for a class was a D in high school. I was never able to write what I wanted, what suited me. It was always a set type of paper, always structured, and that isn't me as a writer.
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I wake up with a splitting headache, so unbearable that even when dust would hit the floor it sounded like a bomb going off. I couldnt even open my eyes, the sun was so bright, as if the suns rays were burning holes through my eyes. although my eyes were glued shut, my tears still managed to twinkle out.
He tells me that I have Meningitis, and that its an infection of the brain. Hering those words, my body gets week and my stomic starts to turn.
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Then the building falls, and the screaming is like nails on a chalkboard. I then begin to wonder, wasnt my aunt coming home for vacation to see everyone? then I begin to tear up. The thought that my aunt could of died and been one of those planes is something so devastating. The rest of the day was silent, I could hear a pin drop....
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Then the brakes on the car in front of you squeal, you try hard to stop, but lose control of the wheel, you skid off the road, and you know you have crashed, the dashboard, is shattered, the windshield is smashed, Minutes like hours, your in treacherous pain, that washes your senses, envelops your brain, the screams all around you are faint to your ears, as life flashes before you, your hopes and fears,
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Before I know it, i am crying. I feel so fucking stupid. I don't want to be a wreck. I want to be together for you. I know I promised I would. I failed you. I am so sorry for that. I wish I could tell you how sorry I am for the way I've behaved. My fingertips caress the headstone in the same way you did all those years ago. "I never told you enough how much I loved you." I curl up by your headstone and close my eyes. Tonight, the only place I can sleep is here. With you.
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She is the one who has helped me through the worse things possible. She has truly changed me for the better as a person. This person that I speak about is my best friend here at school, her name is Jenn. At first we started as a couple, but things happened down the road and it turned out that we are much better as friends.
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I am quite sure you are going to kill me one day. I can still picture your shy smile in my head after all this time. I should be angry with you. But I can't be. I lay back and stare up at the stars. The graveyard is the only place dark enough to see them. I remember going to the planetarium in elementary school and the feeling i got when the lights went out and the stars dotted the ceiling. I feel small, a speck in the giant eye of the universe. It's a comforting feeling for me.
*****
I sit in my dorm room, bored. I stare around the room. My room is a lot like a prison cell. It is a squire concreat box with a window at the end, looking out to dumpster. The walls are white and are cold as ice. Im surounded by four concreate walls and a big metal door. Am i being punished for going to school.
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She could of given up on me when she first thought what she did, but she stuck around to see what my real potentual was. Her personality is truly out there, very adventurous and outgoing. She can always put a smile on my face when i'm upset, even when no one else can. I was having a really rough day, dealing with my health problems and she came busting into the room wearing rediculas cloths and says "Hey its time to cheer up!" I had asked "why?" and her response was "because I am here, and theres no need to sit alone and dwell over it, thats why!"
